I was reflecting on a marriage that has ended, friendships that have been lost because of this, lifestyle changes in the mix and a burgeoning love that nourishes me every moment of the day. Now I wont go into why the marriage ended -- that is a private matter between myself & my ex spouse but I have to say the friendships lost have cut deep. These were people I counted on as friends over the past 8 years and to find that I am now the 'tarnished one' because of a marital split -- hurts like hell! The part that has hurt in that instance the most is the fact that when I needed those friends the most not one of them was in sight. So I shouldered the load, pushed on with the love & support of some other friends whom I love dearly & one amazing person whom I would lay my life on the line for. I guess the light at the end of the tunnel is that my ex spouse & I have managed to stay friends....not always an easy thing to do whilst co-habitating but we have managed that for the most part. He was my best friend for a very long time -- sadly it was no singular act that caused this -- people grow -- people change....people sadly grow apart. So I know that people attached to him still read this -- I do still care for him -- he is a good man & I will always say that....I hope he finds the right person to give him all that he deserves.
Lifestyle changes are ahead now & especially once I move back to Sydney in July. Yes I am moving back to where I came -- I have made the choice on the fact Shrimpy needs to be close to the hospital where he has been having treatment for his entire life -- and it is also the hospital that his transplant will take place at. I will move in with my parents in the interim until I find something suitable to live in & then I will be living alone with Bek & Shrimpy....god help me lol. I will have the support of my parents & some wonderful friends such as Kass, Lynne & Luke. I will be doing my level best to do all I can to keep Shrimpy on the path to receiving his transplant sooner rather then later, so that we can all start that next healthy chapter of our lives together. I will miss living in the Hunter Valley for sure as it is a gorgeous place to live & there are some amazing opportunities up here for kids...plus it is a much better environment for the kids to grow up in...semi rural with city comforts. Who knows in time we may end up back in the country again in a house that we will happily call home time my last breathe is drawn -- who knows what the future holds for any of us.
I have not managed to scrap at all this week -- motivation was low due to some health issues and my mind was not in the zone either. I need to crack the whip though as Mother's Day is next weekend & I want to get something done for my mother & into the post before weeks end aarrggh.
My first ever overseas trip is coming up fast now -- 39 days to go until I fly out -- I so can not wait!! Photography heaven! Amazing amazing company for 9 bliss filled days! I knwo now I will not want to return and every day I stop myself thinking about the trip back -- but I also know that it is a new beginning for me. A new life.
Jess went to a birthday party today with Jut -- they were the only ones invited & that was fine --a sign of how life is from now on -- but Bek was hurt by it & we both shed a few tears -- life goes on. Jess looked ever so grown up though -- man did I stop to wonder where the time had gone. She looks sooo grown up -- where is the baby I knew? She is 6 this coming Friday :(
Daddy -- I want to kiss you
Jess -- let Daddy kiss you now
3 comments:
Sounds like you have had a tough week Terri, hugs to you babe!! I am sad that you are moving away, but it sounds like you are making all the right decisions for your family. We are always here when you need us!!
God Terry I don't know how you have carried on for the last 6 months with so much happening to you!! You must be one tough cookie....although I'm sure you're soft and chewy inside!!
I guess you can count your true friends on one hand and start again....with those who really value you as an individual!!
I love love love Jess's denim skirt doesn't she look all grown up....I bought Georgia some denim shorts to wear over leggings and she looks like a 10 year old!! I wanted to say "stop" you can't go out but sh's only a kid!!
Love Ruth xxx
I get caught in those moments when past thoughts over take what I am doing now. I think you are very fortunate that you have a good relationship with your ex, when my husband and I split I lost all my friends, and after they found out the truth of the situation they sided with me but the worst was over already.
I wish you the best in your life changes, change is never easy but I think you sound like a strong person and you will make the best of it.
Your daughter is adorable, and those are great shots.
Post a Comment